Double double, toilet trouble
And may the boiling water never bubble
Of those who failed on wood to knock
When speaking of our youngest stock.
A pox upon the cursed head
Of any whom in the past have said:
"Oh so sweet with manner mild
Is your youngest. Lovely child!"
This horrid words a plague have brought
And to my soul, a lesson taught.
If 'twas you those words did depart,
Heed the tale I now impart.
Hear of my daughter, the tiny Brynn,
Of sparkly eye and stunning grin.
She catcheth all who gaze her face,
Her net draws them in at an alarming pace.
But there is a side that they have never seen
And so their view is squeaky clean
In the public eye, she coos and giggles
In strangers views, she smiles and wiggles!
But when the door at home will close,
Another face, she does disclose.
From joyous to joyless in less than a blink.
Transitions faster than the brain can think.
To put her down will draw a squall,
Alligator tears from her eyes do fall.
And screams to shame the banshee's cry
Erupt from this apple of my eye.
She flails her arms and wails in woe
To shake the walls of Jericho.
The Lord's own angels would soon go mad,
Asking "Whyever is that child so sad?"
But this distressed visage will die,
When falling under the spying eye
Of one who goes not by "dad" or "mom"
And is replaced with perfect aplomb.
Those who would congratulate
Us on our stunning, lucky fate
Of children who are sweet and kind
Would do well to keep in mind
You have doomed, with hex and jinx,
Us to an attitude that stinks.
Much like diapers, from back two weeks,
We must take out from home what reeks.
She is quite cute, we do concede
But a tearless hour is what we need.
So in private, we call her, with white flag unfurled,
"The saddest baby in the world."
Edit:
It has come to my attention from some above
That I, not once, did declare my love!
Through time happy and sad, you can rest assure
That this young child, we deeply adore!
This lovely child is perfect not,
But screaming, crying or covered with snot
Our love for her, daily does progress
And we wouldn't trade her for all the cash in congress.
